But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. (Titus 3:4-7 ESV)
You can never have enough reminders that salvation comes by grace and not your own efforts. Grace comes first and continues to come day after day! If God won me by grace, I must win others by grace. This is something I tend to remember selectively. There are some in my life that I would force into godliness. I could say that it is because I love them too much to see them make poor choices. While I do love them, to blame this gracelessness on love would be to fail to understand love. It is more reflective of my own fear, my own idolatry of expectations than love.
O Lord! Help me let go of expectations as idols! Help me to truly love (seek what is best by grace) those I love (hold dear to my heart). Help me remember grace!